If you haven’t seen it yet, I would highly recommend the movie, “Bonhoffer: Pastor. Spy. Assassin.” I do get the feeling it could have been more compelling. There were subtle hints to his deep convictions that could have been missed. But, it’s a movie after all. It does make me more curious about the life of the man. A life of one who challenged the difference between religion and Christ and when under persecution stood firm. His life contains so many excellent quotes (note: some are not verified, yet, all over the internet as his). However, there’s one that stands out…..“When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die.” 

A great movie should not just be entertaining or about a social injustice that needs attention; it should point us to Jesus Christ. Christ rather than religion. Religion is more about comfort (yes, I wrote ‘comfort’) than death. Religion just checks the boxes. There’s no real sacrifice. No death. Death to oneself. Death to flesh. Death to reputation. Death to sin. Death of any kind is uncomfortable. It is letting go. Letting go of those things that bind us and keep us captive. Letting go of mindsets. Yet at the same time, it is an invitation to Christ. To a relationship with Him. To Life. True life. Real life giving life. To freedom. To mercy, forgiveness, grace, peace, love, joy, hope and so much more! A relationship. A covenant relationship.

Bonhoffer’s quote refers to dying to self , which is found multiple places throughout Scripture including Galatians 2:20. But what in the world does it look like? Didn’t Christ come to give us an abundant life? Yes, He did. [Read John 10, all of it.] Then, ask yourself, what does an abundant life look like? I will say this, from my own personal experience, I do not think we can define it by our Western thinking. Honestly, defining anything with that mindset is not going to bring us closer to the truth. For me, an abundant life has nothing to do with things that this world has to offer. In it’s more accurate translation, it would mean to have life to the fullest measure. Life with Christ. An uncommon life, where the circumstances around you don’t rob you of all that He is and has granted to you as His.

Recently, I heard a Lou Engle say, “We have taught a generation to feast and play, but the times demand we fast and pray.” Guilty as charged. And I would add that generations have been taught that way, not just one. A deep abiding relationship will yield fasting and praying because of a life touched deeply by His mercy and grace, and oh so much more. That life will demonstrate it to others. My desire is for my life to be an example of a journey growing up in Him and into the mature daughter He created me to be. To fulfill my destiny as His.

Dying to self and living life to the fullest are not once and done. It is a life long process of growing up into Christ. Growing in our relationship with Him. Developing any relationship takes time, energy and sacrifice. Another reason why digging into The Word is so vital. The Word teaches us His character and nature that is unchanging.

Every single author in the Word of God was Jewish. They were not Greek. They were not European or American. They were from the land of Israel. A land teeming with more history than our minds can comprehend. Hebrews with an understanding of their ways, customs and thinking. Western thinking is more along the lines of reasoning. It’s much more linear than the Hebraic mindsets of the authors of Scripture, which tends to be more cyclical. The more I have studied the Word, the more this has come to light for me. The cycles and repeated patterns. The parallelism throughout the whole Scripture is incredible. This is one reason we are to rightly divide the Word or ……..

“Do all you can to present yourself to God as someone worthy of his approval, as a worker with no need to be ashamed, because he deals straightforwardly with the Word of Truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15 CJB

Here, the Greek word used in this New Testament Scripture is orthotomeo (G3718 in the Strong’s Concordance) meaning ‘to cut straight (ways)’. A phrase that I recall from childhood, ‘cut straight a way’ meaning get to the point. In the Thayer’s Greek Lexicon, G3718 can mean to teach the truth correctly and directly. To teach it, one should be in The Word and studying it with God Himself. Invite Him into your study, ask Him the questions that arise and wait on Him. He has guided me to make connections throughout Scripture that I would not have done on my own. Let Him be your Guide! If you are studying a chapter in Scripture and another Scripture comes to mind, go with it. See if there is any connection. That one coming to mind, may just be Him leading you. Once, I heard a wise teacher say that do not need another interpretation, but a revelation. Let God reveal the Word of Truth to you. The depth of it will be astounding. I will warn you that this takes getting ‘you’ out of the way. Your thoughts, your mind, your will and your emotions need to be set aside for you to clearly grasp the deep truth He has for us. Like dying to self and living a life to the fullest measure. I believe that this kind of life is one unburden and truly free.

For me personally, the freedom from wrong thinking and false teachings have been like chains falling off and clattering to ground. It has also granted me more clarity on the nature and character of God. If we think or believe we know Him, but are not seeking Him first including in His Word, we are amiss and only fooling ourselves. Earlier this year, I read the Book of Songs (Song of Songs or Song of Solomon) with a whole new set of eyes and ears, along with a heart of understanding. The journey was incredible. It was like an invitation to grow up alongside the bride in the book. To take a look of deep reflection of how far I had come, in addition to where I was on my journey with Him and where I want to be. A book with such deep revelation when you are willing to walk through it with Him. One that describes counting the cost as I willingly consecrate myself to Him drawing me to Him and running together. As we allow ourselves to be drawn by Him, may our spiritual hunger increase and only be satisfied by Him alone.

We learn the progression of maturity in the bride from chapter 3:16, where she states, “My beloved is mine, and I am his….” to “I am my beloved’s and beloved is mine…” (6:3) to “I am my beloved’s and his desire is for me. (7:10)” The Lord is now, her all in all. She in no longer working for Him but with Him. Let this be me Lord! Instead of her trying to possess the Lord, she has allowed herself to be possessed. In the final chapter, she has come to a place of maturity (stable and strong enough) where she is truly ready to help others with a pure heart motive. The movie depicts a similar progression as the immature Bonhoffer grows up in the Lord, until he unwaveringly lays down his life for Him.

Over two years! Honestly, a little too long and now, I’m a bit rusty at this. These last four or more years have been ‘more than’. More than on so many levels. So many life changes, I do not care to keep tally. Both good and bad, according to our flesh. But all in all, necessary. I will get into that later.

Truthfully, I am not here to make this blog. I am not here to make it look spectacular or gain likes or comments, but just to put it out there for God to use it. I pray He uses it to connect to those it is intended, and for His Glory. It is for Him because what I intend to share is what came from Him. If you have read any of my previous posts, you know that I believe in Jesus Christ as Lord. But that is not enough to just believe. The Bible tells us that even the demons believe. There is more. To confess with our mouths and trust He is Who He says He is. I have confessed with my mouth that He is Lord. The Lord of lords and King of kings. And I have witnessed this in my life, often and repeatedly. With God, there is always more!

I’m here to share a journey with you, the reader. A journey to share what I have gained and learned over the years. One that was not planned by me. One that has brought both heartache and joy. One that has continued to form me and mold me because God forbid I stop growing and changing. I hope and pray that anyone reading this never wants to become stagnant in this life or remain stagnant. Or even think that they have ‘arrived.’ We do not have only one life to live. We were created with eternity in mind. It’s with eternity in mind that I want to challenged. Challenged to not to take something/someone for granted. Challenged to test everything, holding onto what is good and keeping away from what is evil. (1 Thessalonians 5:21-22) I have a part to play in my growing up. Growing up in Christ and becoming a mature child of God. I have a part to play in my sanctification process, so to speak. And a process it is! A process of yielding. Aren’t we to work out our own salvation with fear and trembling according to Philippians 2:12?

“Like apples of gold in settings of silver is a word appropriately spoken.” Proverbs 25:11

This blog is about my journey with Him. My journey of yielding to the sanctification process. I have held back for far too long for fear of criticism and judgement along with the fear of man. Enough is enough. It is time to take a stand because that is what He is asking me to do. What I share may sting a bit from time to time. It may be something to wrestle with and dig into for yourself. I may repeat some of what’s been posted in the past from time to time, but my intention is not to rehash those things. I have had to wrestle with and dig in myself. It is not so easy to do. So many resources out there today. Resources that someone else did the wrestling and digging….the hard stuff.

“A person may plan his path, but Adonai directs his steps.” Proverbs 16:9 CJB

My journey with the Lord has taken my turns. Each turn has taught me something. With every turn, one thing remained extremely important. To remain in Him! (John 15:4 & 7) To seek Him first! (Matthew 6:33) This, right here, is where we need to chose to be intentional in our lives. Over the years, that seeking did not always look the same. At first, I struggled with that. Shouldn’t it be consistent? Yes! The time should be, but I learned that I needed to allow the Lord to direct how that time was spent with Him. To yield.

For years and years, I journaled. That journaling had become an incredible blessing. When my journaling waned, I thought something was wrong or lacking. The enemy was whispering to me that I was failing. Journaling is a fantastic tool, but that too can become an idol of sorts. I have learned to let it go and journal when prompted by the Lord. Being free and not bound by what I was creating. Being consistent with something forms a habit. Then when that habit becomes rote and rigid, one loses the life and joy originally discovered.

It was in the last four years that my journaling began to decrease, but my time digging increased. Reading the Word of God as if digging for hidden treasure. Studying it. It began around 2020, after visiting Israel in December 2019. I started reading the Bible chronologically and I did this for about three years. The more I dug, the more I wanted to learn. I had a mindset that if God is GOD and truly Creator of the heavens and the earth, the Beginning and the End, which I do absolutely believe, then there is always more to know and learn about Him. The Bible, ALL Scripture, is inspired by God and is valuable for teaching the truth, according to 2 Timothy 3:16. Where else can one go to learn about His nature and character? I want to know the One who created me and has plans for me. My desire is to have eyes to see and ears to hear and a heart of understanding all that He has for me.

I was raised from the late 60’s into the 80’s. This era compelled many to go to college after high school. And so it was for me. Looking back, I can see how the educational system draws us away from the Creator. I didn’t have a firm foundation in the Lord at the time; therefore, education by the world’s standards became a stumbling block to me. I can still see it today evidenced all around me. The pursuit of higher and higher education leading many astray. I did graduate with a Bachelor of Science degree. But that meant nothing to me the day my firstborn was placed into my arms. I knew deep down with me that I was created to be a mom. My husband and I longed for the provision for me to become a stay-at-home mom, which finally came when our firstborn was 20 months old. Over the years, I struggled with ‘just being a mom.’ The worldly mindset and pressure to contribute to the provision of the family, the lie that there was so much more. Sadly, this didn’t just come from the world, but also from the Church. The performance mentality of go, go, go and do, do, do. This can also affect us in whatever we do, even a mom. I have had to learn to be content, yet still yearn to grow into who He created me to be. More yielding.

Today, I can say that I am beyond grateful to have been a full time homemaker, a wife and mom because that is what I was created to be. Now, I have the wonderful privilege to be Nonna, a grandmother to a growing family. This lifestyle has been a great aid in allowing me the time with the Lord that I cannot have imagined with a full time or even part time job outside of the home. God has been setting me up in order to able to dig in and dig deep, to challenge for myself the mindsets and doctrines taught. I used to think that one had to have gone to seminary to really know the Bible, to know the Truth. I used to trust the words of pastors and teachers, thinking they knew far more than I. However, today, I have a totally different view. Seminary does not, cannot and should not replace seeking Him first. It may aid in learning what is and has been taught and believed. But there is NO greater resource than God Himself. Jesus even said that He must leave and it was to our advantage in order to send the Comforter, the Holy Spirit to lead and guide and teach us. (John 16:7) My husband used to say, “The Word of God should be used to change the world (that includes us), not the world used to change the Word.”

I share this with you to encourage you to dig in for yourself. Get in the Word and let God Himself teach you so you can test everything accordingly. You do not have to go to school. We are called to do the will of God. period. The will of God is NOT complicated! The will of God is to love Him with all your heart, mind (soul) and strength. (Deuteronomy 6, Matthew 22, Mark 12 and Luke 10). THEN, love your neighbor as yourself. These cannot be inverted. We do not have the capacity to love others before loving HIM with everything that we are. If we do, than it is not true love. God is love. (1 John 4:8)

“You, children, are from God and have overcome the false prophets, because HE who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. They are from the world; therefore, they speak the world’s viewpoint; and the world listens to them. We are from God. Whoever knows God listens to us; whoever is not from God doesn’t listen to us. This is how we distinguish the Spirit of truth from the spirit of error. Beloved friends, let us love one another; because love is from God; and everyone who loves has God as his Father and knows God. Those who do not love, do know know God; because God is love.” 1 John 4:4-8 CJB

It would be wise of us to define love by the Word of God and not by the world’s standards or definition, since God is love. To do that, we must be in the Word and of the Word. We are not to conform to the patterns of this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds so that we will know the will of God. Simply cannot do that without studying the Word for ourselves. May I suggest doing a devotion without the input of someone else or another book? Just you, the Word of God and God Himself! He may want to reveal to you something that you have learned from others that is inaccurate. He may want to cleanse you of false teachings and doctrines that have taken root that need to be uprooted. This is exactly what He has been doing in me. This is where the heartache and joy mentioned previously have been. It has not been easy, but oh so worth it. There has been pain, but like childbirth, the result is ‘more than’. Again, yielding.

Once, at a conference, I had someone I didn’t know approach me and tell me that there was a significance to the places I grew up. Very specifically, the street names. I began my life in an apartment on 5th Street, moved to Church Street and then to Liberty Avenue. This brief encounter with someone I didn’t know has become a signpost for me in my life. At the time, I wasn’t quite sure what the message meant. It has taken yielding and studying to gain understanding. It has been a process of pruning, purging, and purifying. This process has been and will continue to be unending.

I am here, now because the Lord has impressed upon me a warning. It was a personal warning based in Ezekiel 33 that I must warn. I must sound the trumpet.

“But if the watchman sees the sword coming and does not blow the trumpet and the people are not warned, and a sword comes and takes a person from them, he is taken away in his iniquity; but his blood I will require from the watchman’s hand.” verse 6

And that will be the purpose of this blog. I am sounding an alarm based on what the Lord has shown me and taught me in the last four or more years. Will you take this journey with me?